Finally Friday

It's Friday already and I realize I haven't posted since I said I was back at it on Tuesday. That doesn't mean I fell off the wagon again though.

I've been busy busting my fat at the gym every day since. I'm trying to get back into my regular routine. It's wearing me out! Seriously, I've had to take a nap almost every day because after the adrenaline rush is gone, I'm just exhausted from all that hard work! I can't help but take a nap.

You would think that I could do all the same things I did before my injury with no problem jumping right back in. It really hasn't been **that** long.

My gym friend Laura told me this week that I am very dedicated and hardworking once I've chosen to do something. It's true, I've always felt this way about myself but it's feels different when someone else says it about you. Which got me to thinking about my journey...

I can seriously go months without slipping up, with out cheating on my diet, with out missing an opportunity to exercise. But I am an all or nothing type of person. You either get all of my efforts, or none. There really is no in between.

Since my injury, I haven't been able to exercise, so I didn't care what I ate. It's true I made some really bad choices that I wouldn't have made if I had been going to the gym. When I'm exercising, I really think about my food choices and if they are worth the hardworking and calorie burning I did at the gym. Most of the time, it keeps me inline with my eating.

When I'm not at the gym, I don't think like that. I can't explain why but the thought doesn't occur to me. Yeah I know I'm not making great choices and I'm not moving more. So I because I'm not exercising I think I'm not going to lose weight anyways because . . . Even though I know weight loss is primarily DIET and secondarily exercise. You can be fit and still be FAT or you can be skinny and be out of shape. It all depends on how frequently you exercise. I'm there, I know it. I can exercise many skinny people... Someday soon, I hope to just be fit.

So what does this all mean, to me? This all or nothing business? My eating habits have greatly improved since I started my journey. I eat until I'm no longer hungry, I do not eat until I'm stuffed or even until I'm "full". I can control my portions. I can enjoy snacks in moderation but I still struggle with sweets. In fact, I think sweets are my biggest hang up because once I get some in my system, my mind craves for more, more and more. It takes a lot of willpower and discipline to get back on track for me and sweets. Moderation by a dieters standards is virtually non-existent. I really need to refocus here, with my sweet intake. Am I ready to do it yet? To be honest, I don't know. Mentally I can want to be skinnier, I can want to eat better all the time but I really have to want it in order to do it. This journey has been so much more to be than becoming skinnier, it's becoming healthier, happier and more spiritual too.

This weeks exercise schedule:

Monday: Running/Walk 3 miles
Tuesday: Body Pump and Cycle
Wednesday: Cycle
Thursday: Body Pump and Cycle
Friday: Cycle (5:30 am)

I did planks once this week and will be doing more today and over the weekend. I want to get in the routine of cycle and abs on Weds with Running Weds night.

Oh and I got to talking to someone at the gym this morning about running, she invited me to go running with her and a group just outside of town they do hill training on the weekends. I'm excited and hope I can join.