Catch Up

So many things have come up that I've wanted to blog about, but I was busy at the time and just couldn't stop and sit down.... Hmmm Now, what was it that I wanted to say? haha

I want to run. Yes, I know you know this. But the last several weeks I've been under so much stress, scrutiny and I just need an outlet. There were so many things that I felt like I needed to run off. Physically though, I just can't. I can tell I'm getting better now though. I'm hopeful that by the end of February, I will be running again. My ankle seems to look more normal, more stable and I'm in less pain. But I can tell it's not as strong as it should be before I go out and run again. I can't even begin to explain how much my mind and body begs for a nice long run.

Saturday, I was crying to Rich. I feel overwhelmed like I'm being pulled in 100 different directions. Between family obligations, softball and our investment I've had little time for me. Which again, is one reason I NEED to run. It helps me cope. Very sweetly, my husband understands and offers to take me on a date. We went out for dinner at the Diamond Back Grill and planned on going bowling together afterwards. We ended up going to Black Oak Casino to go bowling but because it was a weekend the lanes were $25 per hour, not bad if you're going as a group but very pricey for just two people. We ended up playing nickle slot machines and set a budget for our cost of entertainment. Rich lost $20 and I won $10. So basically, we spent $10 on entertainment and enjoyed an evening together. This was both of our first times going to Black Oak, neither of us are big gambler types and didn't set out to go gambling that evening. It just sort of happened but we had fun.

We picked up the girls from the sitter and went to bed. In the morning, we laid around in bed until about noon. - Amazing for us. Rich and I talked and really reconnected. We hadn't been on a date, in about 18 months - 2 years. Too long, I know. Reconnecting and dating is so important to a healthy marriage. We both realize this and hope to have more dates soon. We loved laying in bed and talking to each other all morning, cuddling. It really felt like our date hadn't ended. Amazing I tell you. I feel so blessed to have Rich.

Speaking of blessings. I know I need to pray more. Running can not be my only emotional outltet. I have to rely more on God to help me deal with things when I'm frustrated and overwhelmed. I know a good long talk with God is in order. Even if nothing changes, I know it's important to talk with God.

I had a moment today. A moment of pure joy and bliss. I did laundry and was digging out my pants. I lifted them up and was looking at them. The just seemed so small and cute. I wondered how they could possibly fit me. I sat there and starred at my pants for a good long while. Then, instead of getting dressed I decided to take care of me and take a nice long bath.

What a difference...

Mariyn started softball practice yesterday (I am coaching). It was a great feeling to her enjoy the sport I love. I coached her T-ball team last year. It was then, I really noticed how out of shape I was. Little things, like running the bases seemed so challenging to me. Stretching and warming up got me winded. This year, 45lbs lighter and in a lot better physical condition is going to be different. I ran with the kids yesterday and didn't feel the least bit tired from running, stretching or warming up with the girls. It just felt right. Of course, I felt good knowing the changes I've made and what a difference exercise has made.

I got to the gym early this morning, I wanted to make sure I got the back to back body pump and cycle classes since I missed them on Tuesday. If you recall though, this is the same instructor I had last week, the drill Sargent personality. I decided that I'm not going to let her get in my head and I'm not going to allow myself to feel inadequate. I know how much I've changed; I know what I am capable of and I know I am going to be healthy again. In college I had many professors I didn't like but still gained knowledge from and tolerated in order to meet my goals. I figured I would go into this class with the same attitude. I know she is challenging and despite her criticism I am going to get a good workout and meet my goals. Today, I did just that. I noticed she seemed to correct all the new comers - in the same manner as she did me last week. This week, she didn't correct me as much - twice both were minor. I was more cautious about my form though, which could be a good thing I guess. After the gym, I came home made Amelia lunch, grabbed a handful of almonds for myself. Then we took a much needed nap.

When I picked Mariyn up from school, one of my friends little girl, Emma asked why I always wore the same thing. In a cute way. I do always wear my gym clothes around town. Her mom explained, "because she always goes to the gym, she is in better shape than mommy." This sort of shocked me because this mom is a runner. She may not go to the gym but I know she runs for recreation and she is already thin. I doubt I am really in better shape than she is but I do frequent the gym more often. She does P90X and runs when she can. It still felt like she was complimenting me though.

This afternoon, Mariyn practiced batting. She is going to be my little slugger. She needs a bit more practice though but we enjoyed spending the time together. Rich and I went to the gym again this evening. I rode the bike, slowly like you would for recreation, the worked on my abs and hips. Trying to be supportive and go to the gym with the hubby but not wanting to change my routine can be a little extreme but I'm trying.

Trying something new...

I've had a major sweet tooth. I rarely cheat on my diet - I'm consistent every day. Once in a while, I will reward myself with a skinny cow ice cream but that is a true treat. I've been getting headaches lately and feeling sluggish, which is one reason why I think I might not be consuming enough calories. So, yesterday I decided to have a sweet snack. I ended up having 2 skinny cow ice creams, swiss chocolate cake rolls (3). Today I had a nutter butter bar and a nutrilite energy bar. I'm sure I still did well with my calories but I do feel a little guilty. I shouldn't but I do. For some reason, my hamstrings are super sore today. Not really sure what I did to get them sore - but man I did not feel like working out tonight and really had to force myself to go. Funny thing is I lift heavy weights all week and rarely get sore... weekends I relax. Yesterday I pulled weeds for about an hour (it's the only semi-strenuous thing I can recall doing) and my hamstrings hurt like no one's business!


I had a good workout, cardio kickboxing tonight plus weights with Rich. Chaz one of the trainers taught me a new exercise (new to me anyway). I was waiting on a machine and 3 or so guys were hoarding it. Chaz was walking around bored and we got to talking. He showed me something I could do instead. I laid my shoulders on to a exercise ball with my knees bent out and feet at a 90 degree angle - keeping my core tight and flat as possible. While holding dumbells (20lbs each arm) I moved my arms in and out (like a butterfly) with my elbows bent at a 90 degree angle. It was a challenge! I did 3 sets, I not only worked my chest/pecs but my core and increased my balance! It's nice to get tips every once in a while. Here is something I found online to help out with a visual.

Normally, I shy away from the dumbell exercises but I'm getting more comfortable with my body, with the gym and it's not so bad to try something new. Chaz was even surprised by how strong I am and complimented me. Progress comes in so many forms! Felt good :)

Date Night

After taking a long hiatus, Rich made it back to the gym with me tonight. I'm really trying to be supportive of him and I think it's cute that he wants to go to the gym with me BUT I already have my "routine" going. Weds I always workout on floor with weights and do my cardio. I'm not really consistent about what machines I do but I do get a lot done. Is it bad that I feel he slows me down a bit? I wanted to do at least 30 mins of cardio - we only got 20 in, he started complaining after about 10. So I said, we would do 20 and be done, even though I wanted to do 30. He is so much better at being supportive than I am.

The treadmill and I had a date tonight. I really need to work on getting more running time in if I am gong to be able to do the 5k next month. I am progressing though - I was able to run for 8 minutes straight, about 3/4 of a mile! Huge progress considering it was on the treadmill AND the projector in the cardio cinema was broken. I swear I watched the clock the whole time.

I did good with my diet today. I didn't count my exact calories but I'm guessing it was some where around 1600. We went out to dinner last night for Rich's birthday - had fajitas! Yum and chips and salsa and Chocolate Cake (the mile high kind with caramel). I knew I was probably going to go over so I ate extra careful all day until dinner. This morning everyone wanted a piece of cake for breakfast, I didn't have any and I'm fine with that. There is still half the cake left. I'm really needing to get ride of it and get the temptation out of my house. Rich had a piece just before we went to the gym and I have to admit, I ate some of his frosting :X Just one bite though - nothing too damaging I hope. Ahhh... can you tell I'm a sucker for cake, especially chocolate cake. Perhaps, I should have got him something I wouldn't like ... carrot cake anyone? LOL

Dunn... Dunn...Dunn

Sound effets (Dunn Dunn Dunn) it's arrived. The dreaded two piece I purchased for the contest at the gym. Part of me can't believe I'm going through with this. I mean who wants to see a fat chick in a two piece. Who ever created this rule has to have some sort of issues, lol. Well, that's what I'm telling myself anyways. The swim suit is cute - it looked great on the model and the color is beautiful. Seeing it on myself, umm not so pretty but that's what I'm entering the contest to change. Honestly, I have to say that although it's bad - it's not AS BAD as I thought it was going to be. Of course, my boobs are too big for the top, but that's nothing new. It's just ONE picture right? I decided to show you a picture of the dreaded two piece just so you can get a visual. I'm not sure if I will be brave enough to post the before picture.



Thursday nights I always do Zumba. Adrianna instructs on Thursdays and I always get a great work out. I can feel it in every muscle of my body. Unfortunately, she's been on vacation and we've had subs for a while now. Tonight Julia subbed. She has subbed once before, when I first started going. I remember her class was so challenging. I couldn't keep up. When I seen her tonight, I knew I was in for it! The energy was great though - and the best part - tonight I was able to keep up and got a GREAT workout. Seemed like everyone enjoyed the class, it was probably the most energetic I've seen the class (as a whole) get. Great work out @ zumba plus cardio with Rich. I really love that he comes to the gym to workout with me. I know it's his way of being supportive - and it makes me work out even harder. I call this time a date. It's the closest thing we've gotten to a real date in a long time. Now only if I can convince him we do not need to go have Cafe Bravo (the best Mexican restaurant I've eaten) after working out... at least I had a salad. :-/