Binge

I can't remember the last time I binged. I mean really binged. I've been knocked off track or splurged but really it's been a long time since I've binged. I must admit, I binged today. My girls are sick, we've laid around all weekend, nursing them and watching movies. I'm stressed, probably a bit due to the girls being sick, weather change and financial stress. I'm in a funk.

I decided to go to the store today to rent something from Redbox. My husband asked me to pick him up a candy bar. They were on sale 2 for $1.00. Plus I had two coupons buy one get one free. Yeah, I ended up leaving with 8 candy bars. One for each of my girls. The rest were for my husband and I. I ended up telling myself that if I ate one on the way home, it wouldn't be a big deal, no one would have to know. Yeah, I told myself that. No one would find out. So, I did. I felt so sneaky and I ate it quickly. So quickly that I hardly tasted the flavor. I came home with 7 candy bars. My girls ate 2, my husband ate 2, and I had 2 more! Yep, you read that right I ate 3 candy bars today. 750 (ish) calories wasted, I'm sure. Why did I do this? I'm feeling so incredibly emotional today. Probably due to lack of sleep and lots of financial stress. I can feel that I'm in a funk, this behavior isn't normal for me, any more. Old habits can sneak up on you quickly and are really hard to change.

I'm holding myself accountable and owning my behavior. I could have kept it to myself and no one, other than myself and God, would have known. But I'm blogging about it, letting you all know that while my intentions are good, I too still get off track.