Two Things

Two things I want to talk about today: Men and Working out alone. Which should I start out with? Hmmmm...

Men
I've been with Richard so long that I have no idea what flirting, dating or any thing remotely sexual is really about other than with him. When I was younger, men used to hit on me all the time. Sometimes, women too. I think it had more to do with my large bust than really with me. I was always sort of awkwardly nieve about this type of stuff. You would have to be pretty blunt for me to get it. I'm still that way to an extent. Except now, it's not really appropriate for people to be that blunt because I'm a very happily married woman. With that said, if someone of the opposite sex is friendly towards me, it's still hard for me to tell if they are just friendly or something more. Most of the time, I think they are just friendly because I am friendly. I rarely feel like someone is flirting with me. I'm pretty sure someone at the gym is flirting with me. He talks to me nearly every time he sees me, no matter how busy he is or how far away. There have been times when it was awkward for him to stop what he was doing to say hi, yet he still does. I've told Rich about this just to keep the dialog open and him aware. Today, he talked to me for a long while -not a big deal. I'm friendly and I talk a lot once you get me started. Our conversations started innocently about tanning. I've wanted to tan for a while but the rooms haven't been ready. He initiated the conversation and I asked about prices. There are two options $20 for 6 months or $50 a month no contractual limit. It being summer, and me having a pool I really only want 1-2 months of tanning to get a good base tan for summer. But $50 is really expensive for tanning so I said I would have to ask Rich. Then he responds "Does he really tell you no? I wouldn't tell you no". Made me blush a little but it's not really about Rich telling me yes or no, it's about spending a large amount of money and talking to my husband. Then he asks, "How long have you been married?" A seemingly meaningless question but I've never had a man ask me about my marriage that ACTUALLY cared that I was married. So many men have had the attitude of "Well, are you happy? OR What's that have to do with me?" So I sort of have this bias based upon previous experiences. My marriage is sacred to me. All this time, he is cutting a T-Shirt to work out in; he asked if I wanted one. He said he needed a new shirt for Summer. Seriously dude you work at a gym and only have 1 shirt. Typical guy. I said no thanks to the T-Shirt. I already have 8 workout outfits. He said, I know they're cute. So yeah... I'm pretty sure he was flirting with me. Which is flattering I guess but also awkwardly uncomfortable because he knows I'm married. I talked to Rich about the situation again because I just felt he should know. I asked Rich if it made him feel uncomfortable (because it does me) and he said, "No, because I am secure in our relationship. It would be different if I thought I had something to worry about but I trust you." Ahh... I have the best husband -- he knows just what to say.

Working Out Alone
With that said, Clare is on vacation. I miss her. Kind of weird. A few months ago I always worked out alone. It wasn't a problem and I was making progress. I started working out with Clare because she wanted a partner to do weights with. But I feel we both benefit from it because she encourages me to run and we hold each other accountable. We do Cardio kickboxing together on Mondays, Weds weights and running, often on Fridays we workout together again -depending on our schedules. So yeah Monday cardio kick wasn't the same without Clare and today, I worked out alone. Alone that was fine just a few months ago. I hit the weights hard today no problem and I even pushed myself to run the treadmill because that is what Clare would do. However, I stopped after 20 minutes. It was a good run. I ran the whole time at 5.0 and I could have ran longer BUT I just wanted to be done. I can't wait until Clare returns.