I don't even know how much I weigh right now. What I do know is I've gained back most of the 75lbs I lost. It's disappointing but I have to look at the reasons why and figure out what happened. I had some GREAT success.
What changed and when?
I was diligent at working out and eating healthy. It had lasted months, but I injured myself and couldn't work out like I did. I lost motivation. We opened up our own business and my life went crazy. My schedule changed, my stress level increased and my old habbits of eating out for convience came back. Then I got into a habbit of "might as well" because I've already failed.
Good news
I know how to eat healthy.
I still enjoy excercise and still compete in races. It's fun for me, even if I have to walk to finish.
I can start again. I've found a product I think will really help me. I don't normally believe in "diets" but I think where I am now, what do I have to lose? Well, truthfully 75-100 lbs.
I've set a goal, I'm going to focus on meeting that goal and doing what I can. I know I can be successful. On Monday I will start my challenge. My goal is to lose 30 lbs in 90 days. If I'm focused, I know I can meet and exceed the goal. As I start my challenge I will be holding myself accountable and sharing my results. I'd love for you to join me. Your goal can be anything... ANYTHING. What would you like to change in 90 days? We can do this!
Thursday, July 26, 2012
Monday, May 7, 2012
Diva Run
Thursday, April 26, 2012
2012 Fitness Events
2012: Fitness Events
5K - May 2012
Wharf to Wharf - 6 Miles July 2012
Nike Womens Marathon - (Half) 13.1
This is it. I'm participating in ALL of these events this year! How awesome is that! I'm so excited and each one is going to FORCE me to train for the next. Pray for no injuries and the running God to be in my favor. ;-) I haven't ran consistently in a while, so I'm starting off small with my first 5K of the year. Then building. Wharf to Wharf is garaunteed to be a lot of fun (it was a blast last year). My goal for NWM is to improve on my time from last year. As long as if I can run, I can do it. Ultimate goal, is to just finish....
Sunday, January 15, 2012
I woke up...
Yesterday, I woke up and I was ticked. Not just angry... but really pissed off. I'm not sure why in particular but I know I've been easily irritable lately and down right mad the last several days or so. As I woke up, my sweet husband tried to cuddle me. I didn't want to cuddle. I was mad. I wanted to be left alone. I thought about all I had to do, and how I needed to shower. But I was so angry. I needed to run. I wanted to run.
No excuses. I just had to do it. I wasn't going to wait until later, why? later probably wouldn't come. So I got out of bed, put on my running clothes, laced up my new shoes, found my ipod and took off.
I thought about a lot of things while running. I thought about how irritable I've been lately. I've been cranky, ticked off, angry and really just down right pissed! I can't really express why just so many reasons and so many excuses. I thought about how bad I miss my healthy lifestyle, my healthy body and all the weight I've gained back. I've wanted to start over again so many times. I've purchased new running gear, new shoes. New running pants and new running shorts. I've really wanted to start over. But I didn't.
You know why? I can't seem to really figure it all out but I think it basically boils down to this... PRIDE. All my excuses since I've been healed revolve around pride and embarrassment. It's like the weight keeps coming on and on but I keep ignoring it like the problem isn't there but it is. I am really starting over this time though. In more ways than one. I'm starting over in my exercise and running routine. For health reasons, for weight reasons and for my own mental health reasons. And really, I'm starting over with my weight loss too. I've gained approx 50 of the 75 lbs that I lost back.
But you know what? I learned lessons from my past too. Including this... I can try again AND I already have the knowledge of everything my body is capable of doing. I can do this. I know what it takes. I also know what caused my long time train wreck.
So, I ran yesterday. I ran until I couldn't run anymore. It was probably a 1/2 mile. It could have been less... but then I walked caught my breath and ran again. I ended up run walking 2.6 miles according to my new Nike+ sensor. I was proud of myself, but embarrassed and ashamed at the same time. The whole time I ran, I thought about how far I had come, and where I am at now. I just needed that one run to prove to myself, I am the same self motivated person I've always been. I can be the person I want to be and I am working on it... starting NOW!
Did I mention, I signed up for a mudrun? It's a 3.5 mile run on April 21st. I signed up last week sometime. So, now I have a goal to work towards and a TON of friends who are doing it with me.
I met up with several friends last night and my friend Frankie and I decided to run together today. We're both needing to train. She came over tonight to run with me. I always tell her she is the younger blonde skinny version of myself. We really have a lot in common but she is 12 years younger than me. Anyways, we ran more than 5 miles tonight. We ran walked but we ran more than we walked and I was able to completely run the first mile. Mariyn, my 9 year old daughter, ran the first 2.6 mile with us. Well, actually, she made me eat her dust for 2.6 miles before she decided she was done running.
2 great runs, 2 days in a row. I WILL be sore tomorrow, I can say, I'm getting back on track! <3
No excuses. I just had to do it. I wasn't going to wait until later, why? later probably wouldn't come. So I got out of bed, put on my running clothes, laced up my new shoes, found my ipod and took off.
I thought about a lot of things while running. I thought about how irritable I've been lately. I've been cranky, ticked off, angry and really just down right pissed! I can't really express why just so many reasons and so many excuses. I thought about how bad I miss my healthy lifestyle, my healthy body and all the weight I've gained back. I've wanted to start over again so many times. I've purchased new running gear, new shoes. New running pants and new running shorts. I've really wanted to start over. But I didn't.
You know why? I can't seem to really figure it all out but I think it basically boils down to this... PRIDE. All my excuses since I've been healed revolve around pride and embarrassment. It's like the weight keeps coming on and on but I keep ignoring it like the problem isn't there but it is. I am really starting over this time though. In more ways than one. I'm starting over in my exercise and running routine. For health reasons, for weight reasons and for my own mental health reasons. And really, I'm starting over with my weight loss too. I've gained approx 50 of the 75 lbs that I lost back.
But you know what? I learned lessons from my past too. Including this... I can try again AND I already have the knowledge of everything my body is capable of doing. I can do this. I know what it takes. I also know what caused my long time train wreck.
So, I ran yesterday. I ran until I couldn't run anymore. It was probably a 1/2 mile. It could have been less... but then I walked caught my breath and ran again. I ended up run walking 2.6 miles according to my new Nike+ sensor. I was proud of myself, but embarrassed and ashamed at the same time. The whole time I ran, I thought about how far I had come, and where I am at now. I just needed that one run to prove to myself, I am the same self motivated person I've always been. I can be the person I want to be and I am working on it... starting NOW!
Did I mention, I signed up for a mudrun? It's a 3.5 mile run on April 21st. I signed up last week sometime. So, now I have a goal to work towards and a TON of friends who are doing it with me.
I met up with several friends last night and my friend Frankie and I decided to run together today. We're both needing to train. She came over tonight to run with me. I always tell her she is the younger blonde skinny version of myself. We really have a lot in common but she is 12 years younger than me. Anyways, we ran more than 5 miles tonight. We ran walked but we ran more than we walked and I was able to completely run the first mile. Mariyn, my 9 year old daughter, ran the first 2.6 mile with us. Well, actually, she made me eat her dust for 2.6 miles before she decided she was done running.
2 great runs, 2 days in a row. I WILL be sore tomorrow, I can say, I'm getting back on track! <3
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
the battle...
On my facebook status today, I checked in at the gym and wrote, Getting here is half the battle. One of my friends commented that for her it was more like 90% of the battle. I had to agree with her, with all the excuses and things to do in life. Showing up, is such a huge accomplishment. Putting in the efforts and getting the job done is really a side effect of being there.
As soon as I left the gym, my workout was complete and I knew my day just got a whole lot better. I was happier, and a just mentally prepared for my day.
I can't wait to go back tomorrow :)
As soon as I left the gym, my workout was complete and I knew my day just got a whole lot better. I was happier, and a just mentally prepared for my day.
I can't wait to go back tomorrow :)
Monday, November 14, 2011
Weighing In
I weighed myself yesterday. I've gained 30lbs this year.
I don't like that number. The weight was way too hard to lose, it's a disappointing. I did it to myself and I have no one else to blame for the damage I've done.
Yesterday was the first time in about 6 months that I've steped foot on a scale. Like so many times before, I was avoiding reality. I knew that I had gained... iI knew that I gained a lot. I was hoping to have a skinny day and weigh myself then, that was the plan. That day, just never came.
I was reading someone's blog yesterday and decided it was time. Time to just do it... Step on the scale and weigh myself. What was I waiting for? If I'm going to start over again, I need to know what the damage was and what I'm dealing with.
I don't like that number. The weight was way too hard to lose, it's a disappointing. I did it to myself and I have no one else to blame for the damage I've done.
Yesterday was the first time in about 6 months that I've steped foot on a scale. Like so many times before, I was avoiding reality. I knew that I had gained... iI knew that I gained a lot. I was hoping to have a skinny day and weigh myself then, that was the plan. That day, just never came.
I was reading someone's blog yesterday and decided it was time. Time to just do it... Step on the scale and weigh myself. What was I waiting for? If I'm going to start over again, I need to know what the damage was and what I'm dealing with.
Wednesday, November 2, 2011
Finishing Dead Last
Mariyn, my 9 year old and I decided to do a local 5K on Sunday. It was a small Halloween themed run. Zumara ran it too. I didn't have anyone to watch Amelia. Rich was hunting and I really just didn't have anyone. So, instead of not participating, I decided to take her with me.... and push her in the stroller. Problem solved, right?
Well, I don't exactly have a jogging stroller. I have a britax preview. It's one step up from an umbrella stroller. Amelia is 4/2 and probably weighs 40+lbs herself+ the weight of the stroller. I see people completing runs with kids/strollers all the time. I really didn't think it would be a big deal -- at all.
Like I said, it was a small run. Very small, and well it ended up being mostly runners and very few walkers. I'm not back running yet and I knew I would be slower with the stroller, so I started toward the end of the pack. Mairyn started a lot closer to the front. Before the race, we chose a meeting point, near the finish line just incase she finished before me.
When the race began, Amelia an I took off. It was fun, but challenging. I'd never ran with her in the stroller before. She enjoyed the race. At about 1 mile, it was time for me to walk. Pushing Amelia was a lot harder than I anticipated. I decided that I would just keep going.
For the first half mile or so, I could see Mariyn but soon she had ran so far ahead that I could no longer see her. No big deal, I figured she would eventually tire out and I would be able to catch up. About the 1.5 mile mark, I noticed I was almost dead last. There was a guy behind me, dressed as a redneck runner. Iassumed he was the pacer and wasn't going to to be passing me. Amelia and I continued on our walk/run. I cracked jokes about the pacer behind me and finishing dead last. Hey, at least I was willing to move my body for the full 3.1 miles!
At first, I really wanted to catch up with the other runners/walkers. Then I thought about all the obstacles I had in front of me. No sitter, pushing a 50+lbs stroller w/ kid, while running/walking. No training. And a bum ankle. I thought about all the weight I've put back on. About how well, I used to do and where I am now.... FAT AGAIN!
I **almost** started to feel bad about things and for myself. But something in me just said, keep going. So, I did. At mile 2, I thought about my daughter. Here it was the day before Halloween and my 9 year old is running a 5K. Yeah, mine. Here is my 4 year old, participating in one too (like it or not). I still hadn't caught up with Mariyn. And you know, I was ok with that. One of my biggest reasons for wanting to lose weight was to be active with my children and teach them a healthy lifesyle. I want them to love being active. And Mariyn does!
Mariyn finishsed the run at 36 minutes and 7 seconds. More than 10 minutes ahead of me. I finished at 47 minutes 38 seconds. Probably my slowest time ever but that really isn't the point. My point is, I finished and I enjoyed a great time with BOTH of my daughters teaching them a better healthier way of life. Words can not express how proud I am of my daughter and she was proud of me, even if I finished dead last. :)
Well, I don't exactly have a jogging stroller. I have a britax preview. It's one step up from an umbrella stroller. Amelia is 4/2 and probably weighs 40+lbs herself+ the weight of the stroller. I see people completing runs with kids/strollers all the time. I really didn't think it would be a big deal -- at all.
Like I said, it was a small run. Very small, and well it ended up being mostly runners and very few walkers. I'm not back running yet and I knew I would be slower with the stroller, so I started toward the end of the pack. Mairyn started a lot closer to the front. Before the race, we chose a meeting point, near the finish line just incase she finished before me.
When the race began, Amelia an I took off. It was fun, but challenging. I'd never ran with her in the stroller before. She enjoyed the race. At about 1 mile, it was time for me to walk. Pushing Amelia was a lot harder than I anticipated. I decided that I would just keep going.
For the first half mile or so, I could see Mariyn but soon she had ran so far ahead that I could no longer see her. No big deal, I figured she would eventually tire out and I would be able to catch up. About the 1.5 mile mark, I noticed I was almost dead last. There was a guy behind me, dressed as a redneck runner. Iassumed he was the pacer and wasn't going to to be passing me. Amelia and I continued on our walk/run. I cracked jokes about the pacer behind me and finishing dead last. Hey, at least I was willing to move my body for the full 3.1 miles!
At first, I really wanted to catch up with the other runners/walkers. Then I thought about all the obstacles I had in front of me. No sitter, pushing a 50+lbs stroller w/ kid, while running/walking. No training. And a bum ankle. I thought about all the weight I've put back on. About how well, I used to do and where I am now.... FAT AGAIN!
I **almost** started to feel bad about things and for myself. But something in me just said, keep going. So, I did. At mile 2, I thought about my daughter. Here it was the day before Halloween and my 9 year old is running a 5K. Yeah, mine. Here is my 4 year old, participating in one too (like it or not). I still hadn't caught up with Mariyn. And you know, I was ok with that. One of my biggest reasons for wanting to lose weight was to be active with my children and teach them a healthy lifesyle. I want them to love being active. And Mariyn does!
Mariyn finishsed the run at 36 minutes and 7 seconds. More than 10 minutes ahead of me. I finished at 47 minutes 38 seconds. Probably my slowest time ever but that really isn't the point. My point is, I finished and I enjoyed a great time with BOTH of my daughters teaching them a better healthier way of life. Words can not express how proud I am of my daughter and she was proud of me, even if I finished dead last. :)
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