Cuddling in bed with my husband this morning, he asked me the question. "When are you going back to the gym?" I thought about it and I didn't know. Passing the buck, I responded, "When are you going back to the gym?" He didn't respond so I said, thought for a minute and said, tomorrow. I will go attempt to do spin tommorrow at 9:30. He said, I'll go tomorrow morning then too.
I asked my hubby if he would put the cleats in my spin shoes. I got them back in Oct/Nov but he didn't put them together right away. Then I got injured and they've been sitting here unused ever since. Well, tonight he goes to put them together and there is a piece missing. :-/ Darn ebay, new conidtion w/ open box. It's been far to long to say anything so I will be spending money on new cleats. At least I have the pedals.
Late Friday afternoon, I stepped on a rusty old nail. It went through my shoe and pricked my toe. Pulling it out, I pricked my finger. Guess who hadn't had a tetnus shot since high school? Yeah that would be me. Miss clumsy. I tried to convince myself that the rusty old nail thing was probably an old wives tale and that I could save the money. But I googled it.... and decided it was better safe than sorry if I just went to the doctor. The side effects of tetnus just didn't look appealing nor did the treatment. So I spent the money and went to a clinic on Saturday. Got my tetnus vaccine and whooping cough booster. Fun stuff I tell you. My arm was so so sore and tender for 2 days. But at least I won't have to worry about tetnus, bacterial and spores causing my body to cease up. If you haven't gotten your tetnus shot in the last 10 years, you just might want to. Oh and at the doctors office, I weighed in 188 lbs. 3 pound gain, I'm not sure when. But I know I've been off the wagon for a while so the damage isn't too bad.
I'm excited and nervous to be back at the gym. Excited to see my friends. Nervous about my injury and being able to keep up. I'm certain that I will get my butt kicked tomorrow and hopefull that my endurance will return.
I might have been off the wagon lately, but honestly I've never completely given up. I know there is no going back to where I was before. Nor do I want to.
Monday, February 28, 2011
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Focus
My foot hurts. That's it really my ankle has been achy for about a week. I've been wearing my brace and taking ibuprofen. It is taking forever to heal.
On a better note, I'm planning my comeback run. March 26, the SOS 5K run. It marks 1 year of my running adventures. If you recall, I ran this was my first race last year and I miraculously took first in my age division. My goal was to be able to run a 5K. This year, I don't know if I will be able to running it at all but I will finish. I am determined to not let me injury sideline me forever.
Tomorrow is Rich's birthday. It's the last day of junk before I go into detox. I've got to get all this sugar and junk food out of my system and focus.
On a better note, I'm planning my comeback run. March 26, the SOS 5K run. It marks 1 year of my running adventures. If you recall, I ran this was my first race last year and I miraculously took first in my age division. My goal was to be able to run a 5K. This year, I don't know if I will be able to running it at all but I will finish. I am determined to not let me injury sideline me forever.
Tomorrow is Rich's birthday. It's the last day of junk before I go into detox. I've got to get all this sugar and junk food out of my system and focus.
Monday, February 7, 2011
Cause and Effect
When I started eating healthy and exercising, I noticed my body was changing. I was changing not only physically and mentally. Something else too, my skin was healthier, my hair was healthier and I felt more rested and more alert even though I would often workout until I was at my limits. I was able to be optomistic easily and felt less stressed. My outlook on life was a lot more positive than it had ever been before.
Now, that I haven't worked out much in the last two months (yes, it's been that long). I'm not eating as healthy as I was. I still make good choices but not great choices. I give into junk, cravings, eating out and other forms of diet sabatoge with little to no resistance. I'm going through a lot of personal stress right now and I can tell, my body is reacting to it. My skin is breaking out, my hair looks less shinny and healthy. I get cranky, moody and reach breaking points faster. I often feel overwhelmed and I turn to food.
See how quickly old habbits and coping mechanisims can come back? The one thing that is not back is the weight but I can easily see how my excuses and behavior can cause a slipper slope and the weight would follow.
Another thing I noticed, in JanuaryI missed my mom's monthly bible study. I completely forgot about it. Coincidence, I think not. Every month, I enjoy bible study it gives me a new perspective and a way to rejuvenate.
Tomorrow is the February bible study. I'm looking forward to it.
I'm looking forward to getting back into the gym too. Many of my gym friends have let me know, I've sulked long enough and that even though I can't do everything I can do somethings. Maybe that is the kick in the pants that I need...
Now, that I haven't worked out much in the last two months (yes, it's been that long). I'm not eating as healthy as I was. I still make good choices but not great choices. I give into junk, cravings, eating out and other forms of diet sabatoge with little to no resistance. I'm going through a lot of personal stress right now and I can tell, my body is reacting to it. My skin is breaking out, my hair looks less shinny and healthy. I get cranky, moody and reach breaking points faster. I often feel overwhelmed and I turn to food.
See how quickly old habbits and coping mechanisims can come back? The one thing that is not back is the weight but I can easily see how my excuses and behavior can cause a slipper slope and the weight would follow.
Another thing I noticed, in JanuaryI missed my mom's monthly bible study. I completely forgot about it. Coincidence, I think not. Every month, I enjoy bible study it gives me a new perspective and a way to rejuvenate.
Tomorrow is the February bible study. I'm looking forward to it.
I'm looking forward to getting back into the gym too. Many of my gym friends have let me know, I've sulked long enough and that even though I can't do everything I can do somethings. Maybe that is the kick in the pants that I need...
Sunday, January 30, 2011
weight
I weighed in today, I don't know why, I wasn't expecting a change, and if there was I knew it would be a gain. I've been so busy and stressed lately, I've skipped a lot of meals and eaten less than healthy snacks. There have been days where I didn't eat anything until dinner. We ate out last night. The kids stayed at my mom's and Richard and I celebrated our upcoming 9th wedding anniverary. Crazy to think that we could have possibly been together *that* long, but we have.
We layed in bed late this morning, then got up and showered. Rich weighed in and said he lost 2 lbs. MEN! His weight flucatates a lot though and he isn't really trying to lose weight. This got me to thinking, that I should weigh in. I can't remember the last time I did, it's probably been 3 weeks or so. It's sort of liberating. I had just gotten out of the shower, I was undressed my hair was wet. I hadn't eaten yet so I figured, why not. Besides with my hair being wet, I just *knew* I would weigh heavier, lol. I already had my excuss ready!
So I stepped on the scale and was shocked! I mean shocked, 184 lbs. That was down 1 lbs since my lowest weigh in. I'm greatful I'm able to maintain my weight loss with everything I am dealing with right now.
We layed in bed late this morning, then got up and showered. Rich weighed in and said he lost 2 lbs. MEN! His weight flucatates a lot though and he isn't really trying to lose weight. This got me to thinking, that I should weigh in. I can't remember the last time I did, it's probably been 3 weeks or so. It's sort of liberating. I had just gotten out of the shower, I was undressed my hair was wet. I hadn't eaten yet so I figured, why not. Besides with my hair being wet, I just *knew* I would weigh heavier, lol. I already had my excuss ready!
So I stepped on the scale and was shocked! I mean shocked, 184 lbs. That was down 1 lbs since my lowest weigh in. I'm greatful I'm able to maintain my weight loss with everything I am dealing with right now.
Monday, January 24, 2011
Catch Up
So many things have come up that I've wanted to blog about, but I was busy at the time and just couldn't stop and sit down.... Hmmm Now, what was it that I wanted to say? haha
I want to run. Yes, I know you know this. But the last several weeks I've been under so much stress, scrutiny and I just need an outlet. There were so many things that I felt like I needed to run off. Physically though, I just can't. I can tell I'm getting better now though. I'm hopeful that by the end of February, I will be running again. My ankle seems to look more normal, more stable and I'm in less pain. But I can tell it's not as strong as it should be before I go out and run again. I can't even begin to explain how much my mind and body begs for a nice long run.
Saturday, I was crying to Rich. I feel overwhelmed like I'm being pulled in 100 different directions. Between family obligations, softball and our investment I've had little time for me. Which again, is one reason I NEED to run. It helps me cope. Very sweetly, my husband understands and offers to take me on a date. We went out for dinner at the Diamond Back Grill and planned on going bowling together afterwards. We ended up going to Black Oak Casino to go bowling but because it was a weekend the lanes were $25 per hour, not bad if you're going as a group but very pricey for just two people. We ended up playing nickle slot machines and set a budget for our cost of entertainment. Rich lost $20 and I won $10. So basically, we spent $10 on entertainment and enjoyed an evening together. This was both of our first times going to Black Oak, neither of us are big gambler types and didn't set out to go gambling that evening. It just sort of happened but we had fun.
We picked up the girls from the sitter and went to bed. In the morning, we laid around in bed until about noon. - Amazing for us. Rich and I talked and really reconnected. We hadn't been on a date, in about 18 months - 2 years. Too long, I know. Reconnecting and dating is so important to a healthy marriage. We both realize this and hope to have more dates soon. We loved laying in bed and talking to each other all morning, cuddling. It really felt like our date hadn't ended. Amazing I tell you. I feel so blessed to have Rich.
Speaking of blessings. I know I need to pray more. Running can not be my only emotional outltet. I have to rely more on God to help me deal with things when I'm frustrated and overwhelmed. I know a good long talk with God is in order. Even if nothing changes, I know it's important to talk with God.
I had a moment today. A moment of pure joy and bliss. I did laundry and was digging out my pants. I lifted them up and was looking at them. The just seemed so small and cute. I wondered how they could possibly fit me. I sat there and starred at my pants for a good long while. Then, instead of getting dressed I decided to take care of me and take a nice long bath.
I want to run. Yes, I know you know this. But the last several weeks I've been under so much stress, scrutiny and I just need an outlet. There were so many things that I felt like I needed to run off. Physically though, I just can't. I can tell I'm getting better now though. I'm hopeful that by the end of February, I will be running again. My ankle seems to look more normal, more stable and I'm in less pain. But I can tell it's not as strong as it should be before I go out and run again. I can't even begin to explain how much my mind and body begs for a nice long run.
Saturday, I was crying to Rich. I feel overwhelmed like I'm being pulled in 100 different directions. Between family obligations, softball and our investment I've had little time for me. Which again, is one reason I NEED to run. It helps me cope. Very sweetly, my husband understands and offers to take me on a date. We went out for dinner at the Diamond Back Grill and planned on going bowling together afterwards. We ended up going to Black Oak Casino to go bowling but because it was a weekend the lanes were $25 per hour, not bad if you're going as a group but very pricey for just two people. We ended up playing nickle slot machines and set a budget for our cost of entertainment. Rich lost $20 and I won $10. So basically, we spent $10 on entertainment and enjoyed an evening together. This was both of our first times going to Black Oak, neither of us are big gambler types and didn't set out to go gambling that evening. It just sort of happened but we had fun.
We picked up the girls from the sitter and went to bed. In the morning, we laid around in bed until about noon. - Amazing for us. Rich and I talked and really reconnected. We hadn't been on a date, in about 18 months - 2 years. Too long, I know. Reconnecting and dating is so important to a healthy marriage. We both realize this and hope to have more dates soon. We loved laying in bed and talking to each other all morning, cuddling. It really felt like our date hadn't ended. Amazing I tell you. I feel so blessed to have Rich.
Speaking of blessings. I know I need to pray more. Running can not be my only emotional outltet. I have to rely more on God to help me deal with things when I'm frustrated and overwhelmed. I know a good long talk with God is in order. Even if nothing changes, I know it's important to talk with God.
I had a moment today. A moment of pure joy and bliss. I did laundry and was digging out my pants. I lifted them up and was looking at them. The just seemed so small and cute. I wondered how they could possibly fit me. I sat there and starred at my pants for a good long while. Then, instead of getting dressed I decided to take care of me and take a nice long bath.
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Fat Pig
I'm sorry I've been neglecting you. Life has seemed to have gotten really busy lately. I have a lot of obligations/jobs for someone who doesn't really work. Ahh... the life of a stay at home mom.
I miss my routine. I attempt to read most of your blogs from my iphone but commenting is a lot harder I've found. Hopefully I get used to it soon or get more computer time.
I heard through the grape vine that someone called me a "Fat Pig" last night and has been using this name for me for a while now. Yeah - so childish, I know. I'm still overweight I realize this but in the grand scheme of things I don't look that FAT anymore. In fact, I'm pretty sure the person who said this about me is much larger than I am. Maybe not weight but in terms of size. But then again, the type of adult that would just casually call people names and verbally attack them, based on nonsense and appearance, isn't one that I would consider classy. So really I am considering the source. But I would be dishonest if I said the comment didn't shock me and send me into a reality check, questioning my weight issues. Yeah, I really don't like drama in my life. I can seriously do with out and just get my fill by reading Facebook, TMZ or Perez Hiliton.
Fun stuff, I tell you. The curve ball life has thrown at me has left no time for swimming, working out or really anything about me lately. I really need to learn my limits better. I need to pray about things.
I miss my routine. I attempt to read most of your blogs from my iphone but commenting is a lot harder I've found. Hopefully I get used to it soon or get more computer time.
I heard through the grape vine that someone called me a "Fat Pig" last night and has been using this name for me for a while now. Yeah - so childish, I know. I'm still overweight I realize this but in the grand scheme of things I don't look that FAT anymore. In fact, I'm pretty sure the person who said this about me is much larger than I am. Maybe not weight but in terms of size. But then again, the type of adult that would just casually call people names and verbally attack them, based on nonsense and appearance, isn't one that I would consider classy. So really I am considering the source. But I would be dishonest if I said the comment didn't shock me and send me into a reality check, questioning my weight issues. Yeah, I really don't like drama in my life. I can seriously do with out and just get my fill by reading Facebook, TMZ or Perez Hiliton.
Fun stuff, I tell you. The curve ball life has thrown at me has left no time for swimming, working out or really anything about me lately. I really need to learn my limits better. I need to pray about things.
Friday, January 14, 2011
Peace of Mind
I finally went to the doctor today about my ankle. Yeah it's still bothering me. A lot. It's not the worst pain in the world but it's consistent and it's pain. Plus my foot/ankle just looks funny. Since I don't have insurance I've been avoiding going but I know I needed to go now. If not for anything other than peace of mind that I'm not doing more harm than good to my foot. I want to be able to run again, play softball and train. I want to create goals for 2011 but before I can even do that I have to be able to know I can workout.
I really don't have the extra money to waste on testing and doctor visits just to find out I'm fine. I don't have health insurance either so I'm cautious about going to the doctor. I realized this week that my primary injury is nearly 2 months old and my secondary injury (the worse of the two) is over a month old. I think it's time to see a doctor.
Doc said, I've torn ligaments in my ankle. There are 3 rubber band like ligaments around your ankle and I tore/strained one of them very severely and possibly fractured a small peice of the bone. He said it would take approx 3-6 months to heal from my injury but my ankle is surprisingly stable for the type of injury I have. He didn't do an X-Ray or MRI today because he feels it wouldn't change the treatment of the injury at this time. Unless you are a professional athlete they typically do not operate on these injuries. It will take a while, he said but it should heal on it's own. If I go over 6 months without healing then we should consider surgery and other options. For now, he said I am doing everything just right. Ibuprofen, Ice, Wrap and no impact.
He said I could continue to swim that it's an excellent workout for my type of injury. I'm relived - not because my injury is better but because I know I will get better. Some day, in God's time. I'm anxious to fill my racing calendar but I know my first goal to to get healthy so I can be active again.
I really don't have the extra money to waste on testing and doctor visits just to find out I'm fine. I don't have health insurance either so I'm cautious about going to the doctor. I realized this week that my primary injury is nearly 2 months old and my secondary injury (the worse of the two) is over a month old. I think it's time to see a doctor.
Doc said, I've torn ligaments in my ankle. There are 3 rubber band like ligaments around your ankle and I tore/strained one of them very severely and possibly fractured a small peice of the bone. He said it would take approx 3-6 months to heal from my injury but my ankle is surprisingly stable for the type of injury I have. He didn't do an X-Ray or MRI today because he feels it wouldn't change the treatment of the injury at this time. Unless you are a professional athlete they typically do not operate on these injuries. It will take a while, he said but it should heal on it's own. If I go over 6 months without healing then we should consider surgery and other options. For now, he said I am doing everything just right. Ibuprofen, Ice, Wrap and no impact.
He said I could continue to swim that it's an excellent workout for my type of injury. I'm relived - not because my injury is better but because I know I will get better. Some day, in God's time. I'm anxious to fill my racing calendar but I know my first goal to to get healthy so I can be active again.
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